amoying:

*smuggles junk food into bedroom without getting caught by the authorities*

grodus:

true friendship is being comfortable enough to openly discuss pornography with each other

(Source: drgero)

Parents: Don't forget to make us proud
Friends: Don't forget to socialize
Teachers: Don't forget to get A's
Strangers: Don't forget to blend in
Opposite sex: Don't forget to look good
Society: Don't forget to be perfect
Tumblr: Fuck the world, they're peasants. At least you haven't murdered somebody today
Tumblr: But just in case you want to get away with it, here are some tips.